As a parent with young school going children, you want to be there for them all the time, being available when they need help, guidance, company etc. You also want to not miss major milestones, achievements, celebrations as they grow up.
This by itself is a luxury that not many parent can afford in Singapore. With most families having both parents working full time, what happens to their kids?
When they are very very young (below school age), there's full day childcare, either with professionals or with extended family help.
When they start going to school (primary, secondary), there's after school student care options, or someone could be at home (a grandparent), or a live-in domestic helper, or maybe even just the kids will be home alone after school and before parents leave office.
Then when you finally got vacation leave approved, maybe for 7-10 days a stretch, you plan efficiently for your family overseas trip, squeezing as much itinerary as you can possibly afford to, both time and money wise. But you probably don't enjoy the break. It's like a compression of everything you wanted to do, a big rush, a major hustle, not very different from your day job. Its ironic.
Things could had been better in past few years due to WFH possibilities forced by Covid. But WFH is gradually and surely being pulled away, with most companies starting to mandate 3 days or more in office, and I suspect, full time back in office soon. There are lesser parked cars in my apartment during weekday day time in 2025 vs 2024/23. That's the reason
Now, imagine you had lived a life in last 20 years or so, gainfully employed but allowed to fully work from home as a remote worker, with the occasional travel overseas for 1 week or so, 3-4 times a year. This is huge. It means, you literally are present to your kids all the time! You see all their milestones, you get to pick them up after school, where you either see kids being picked up by grandparents, domestic helpers most of the time. Your kid won't know the privilege given his/her young age, but you definitely feel it yourself. It is magic for a parent do be able to do that.
This was my life while I was working in past 20 years. I am hugely cognisant of how fortunate I was to be in such a situation. Zero regrets to be able to do something like this period of my life. I continue to enjoy this freedom, in fact even more now, given I no longer have to work. It's icing on the cake. No more work commitments, stresses. Just freedom to continue to be there for my kids and family, PLUS having all these free time to use while they are at school/work. I had felt the freedom of living unstructured time periods, experience spontaneous decisions to do something, go somewhere. I have tasted honey, honey that is out of reach for many others. I am grateful.
This joy of freedom comes with a price, which is lesser financial means for future. But tomorrow isn't guaranteed, as they say. So when is it enough to start enjoying this joy of freedom?
This is a very hard decision. I always see myself as a provider kind of person. So my constant worry is whether I can provide, for my wife, myself, my kids and my parent. If I made a wrong decision, I will be very upset and disappointed. It's like falling just 10 meters before finishing line of a 42km marathon, because I decided to sprint towards it, but my legs were actually jello.
Still, this joy that I had and continue to enjoy, its too attractive and seductive. It's like winning the game in life.
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